FINAL COUNTDOWN
The FA Cup has been in decline for a number of years now, so much so that this year's final will be played in a headers and volleys format in the Wembley car park, a decision heavily criticised by Petr Cech, whose mum will get dead angry if he cuts up his tracksuit trousers diving on concrete. Still, is it any wonder that the Cup is in trouble – apart from the fact that it's up against The Good Life, Come Dine With Me and quizshow-gasm Pointless Celebrity in the TV schedules – when the two sides involved have their sights on bigger things? In the coming weeks, Chelsea could become champions of Europe in club football's biggest game, while Liverpool have the opportunity to show that they're a bit better than West Brom.
Sorry.
And Fulham.
Still, England's Brave John Terry is not just focused on Big Cup. Taking the heroic decision to think about someone other than himself for once, EBJT wants to win the Cup for Roberto Di Matteo. "To win will put himself in a very good position," roared EBJT, who will have to do without knacked team-mates David Luiz and Gary Cahill. "He's very passionate, he's Chelsea through and through, and that's certainly rubbed off on the players. So, if we can do it with the added bonus that Robbie can get the job at the end, that'd be great."
Twenty years ago, an FA Cup win would be considered a good season, now it will just about do. But camouflage expert Stewart Downing – a man so expert at hiding that he can play in front of 40,000 people without anyone spotting him – is in fighting mode. "If I have something to say, I say it," said Downing, true to his word. Although he said it really quietly in case anyone noticed. "We are building a good team. To win the Carling Cup in the first season and potentially the FA Cup as well would be a great start," he added, his whisper drowned out by a falling leaf 30 miles away. "It's a building process, it takes time, it's not overnight," he continued, struggling to be heard over a butterfly flapping its wings in Tasmania. Somehow the Fiver reckons EBJT will be a tad louder if Chelsea win tomorrow.
QUOTE OF THE DAY
"Our initial plans include a 15,000-all seated one-tier stand behind the south goal, likely to be the biggest one-tier stand in football" – Chelsea have clearly never seen Dortmund's Sudtribune as they unveil proposals to buy the Battersea power station site.
CONFIDENCE
Arsene Wenger says he is "confident" Robin van Persie will remain an Arsenal player this summer. Other things the Arsenal manager has been confident about:
• 12 July, 2011: Wenger "confident" Cesc Fabregas will remain an Arsenal player.
• 12 July 2011: Wenger "confident" Samir Nasri will remain an Arsenal player.
• 13 June 2007: Wenger "guarantees" Thierry Henry will remain an Arsenal player.
• 29 July, 2004: Wenger "confident" Patrick Vieira will stay at Arsenal.
FIVER LETTERS
"Just a week since Chelsea reach Big Cup final and already they're eyeing up the one new stadium site in London where pigs have been known to fly? It must be great to have the wealth of a Tzar to indulge your every fantasy. All over Battersea, some hope and some despair, I suppose" – Justin Kavanagh.
"I read with interest that Chelsea fan Stephen Fitzwater has been banned for life by the club after he pleaded guilty to a charge of racially aggravated abuse. One can't help wondering what the club's reaction will be should England's Brave John Terry be found guilty of the same in July?" – Steve Brimley.
"While the Fiver is in a Roald Dahl questioning mood (Fiver letters passim), I've always wondered (and been too lazy to find out for myself) if modern copies of 'George's Marvellous Medicine' come with some kind of health warning, saying 'please don't try this'? Just in case some no-win no-fee lawyers fancy trying to sue the Dahl estate" – Matthew Corbishley.
"Re: Phil Mclean's reference to KPI as being an acronym (yesterday's Fiver letters). Could I, along with 1,056 fellow pedants, mention in passing that KPI is but a lowly abbreviation. Acronyms are an elitist subset that have the distinction of being pronounceable words (such as radar and Nato). Yours, etc, etc" – Tim Pike (and 1,056 others).
"May I wonder how it was possible for Roy Keane and Triggs to go on their jolly walks in the days 'preceding' Roy's return to England (yesterday's letters). Surely this would require some sort of Red Dwarf style rip in the time/space continuum?" – Tom Gorman.
Send your letters to the.boss@guardian.co.uk. And if you've nothing better to do you can also tweet the Fiver.
BITS AND BOBS
Aston Villa trio James Collins, Chris Herd and Fabian Delph have finally shown the fight the team need to avoid relegation. Unfortunately, they displayed it in a brawl outside a trendy Birmingham nightspot at 2.45am on Tuesday and have been disciplined as a result.
Spurs manager 'Arry Redknapp has denied that the club will sell Gareth Bale to Manchester City. "If we go backwards we're going nowhere basically are we?" he said, in a message that will confound orienteers and grammar fans alike.
Shanghai Shenhua boss Zhu Jun has hastily denied that he is hoping to make L'il Mickey Owen a "marquee signing" for the club. "Who's making such irresponsible statements?" Jun said, resisting the urge to point out Owen would be more of a one man pup tent acquisition these days.
Nasty Leeds have signed Portsmouth defender Jason Pearce and not the Spiritualized frontman Jason Pierce, as some Fiver writers mistakenly thought earlier today.
Fabio Capello has warned Premier League clubs he's looking for a last hurrah, potentially in England. "I know very well the teams and the players," he said, in a statement which will come as news to both the teams and the players.
And ex-Fiorentina coach Delio Rossi has revealed what a fantastic father he is while apologising for thumping Adem Ljajic. "My gesture was ugly, disgraceful and I am very saddened," he parped. "I have never said that I am a saint but you can ask the children and all the players that I have coached in the past what type of person I am. I have never allowed myself to hit anyone, not even my children."
STILL WANT MORE?
Two cups or Big Cup? The Fiver feared this blog was going to include an unpleasant video or a friendly discussion about tea until it saw that the comments section reads like an MBM of a civil war between Liverpool fans.
Scott Murray's Joy of Six recalls half a dozen seasons in the sun, including Glossop's sepia-tinted crop of 1899 and even some teams who were in the top flight in the 20th century too.
Barney Ronay reckons Sol Campbell should have had a better send-off when he retired.
Roy Hodgson is a rational human being who understands the limitations of the England job – and this is a disadvantage when faced with a tabloid editor who thinks replacing an 'R' with a 'W' is front page news, sighs David Lacey.
And James Dart can begin to rebuild his life after penning his final Football League Weekender of the season, in which he offers his tips for the weekend results, the same kind of tips that have set him up for a loss of £154. Ouch.
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ENJOY THE BANK HOLIDAY. SEE YOU ON TUESDAY
انسخ الكود التالى و ضعه فى موقعك او مدونتك.
